Dawnslayer's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[A Wizard's Gift]

Mediocre

I understand it's your second Flash, but I measure everyone by the same yardstick. If we cut you slack, what would be your motivation to imrpove? :)

In any case, this was rather short, with amateur graphics and not much animation, though I will give you credit for lip synching. The ending itself was a bit disappointing, and not because it was an IOU; you need more of a buildup to make the ending funny. As for the bad mic, you might try taking your recording and adjusting it with a sound mixer; ask around to see if there's any useful techniques.

It wasn't horrible, but it left me wanting. Keep trying.

[There she is!!!]

A wondeful story

No matter how many times I watch this, it never ceases to put a smile on my face.

So now that it's done, can we give "There she is!!" its own slot on the Series page now? SamBakZa has definitely earned it.

[These Pancakes Are Tiny]

A true work of art

I think the reason we love this so much is because the characters feel like they're real. As in a person would actually expect these guys to exist somewhere in the world, and in fact have the luck of running into them in the middle of a cuss match at their nearest diner. (I think free writing works really well for you.)

Okay, stuff to make the review helpful...art, great; animation, great; sound, great; plot, great; overall just great. Wouldn't change a thing.

P.S., give serious consideration to making a series out of this. I really like these guys. (And I don't understand Red's point either.)

[.:Short Fight:.]

Too simple

I have no problem with stick figures, but the movements seemed a tad forced. Try making it a little more fluid. (And it was too short.)

[Jump? wht not...]

Boring

I understand it's your first try, but I measure everyone by the same yardstick. The storyline, or what there was of it, lacked even mild bemusement; storyboards can help you develop longer and deeper plots. The green buttons weren't necessary, and I think the replay needed a hit area. Animation can be much improved; look up some tutroials on character building and see what you can come up with. And as I have been told myself, it needs SOUND.

I give you credit for trying, but you leave a lot to be desired.

TechB responds:

this was an animation to get the feel for flash. I know it doesn't really have a storyline or any sound. That will come in time i guess. I've been spending ALLOT of time working with macromedia. And its really paying off. I'll be posting soem new stuff sometime idk when but it'll be up. Keep checking back and review some.

[FIFA09 Mini Commercial]

Epileptic overkill

Music and sound, and a lot less bright flashing (these cause seizures), as others have already said. Plus the text cuts were too lengthy and repetitive. You have much to learn; I'd suggest taking some real-world classes to improve your craft.

theterabyte responds:

Guess I should of place a warning... :)

[the tegreninja clip]

My advice

Storyboards are an animator's best friend. If you're not doing that already, now would be a good time to start.

Drawing stick figures is fine for a start, but building characters out of graphics will generally look cleaner and smoother, and save you time in the long run. Look for character building tutorials on the Internet to learn more.

ActionScript: a Flash artist's best friend. Just add the "stop" ActionScript to the final frame to keep it from looping; a "replay" button is usually not a bad idea either.

Keep working at it; I'm sure you'll improve.

[The iPhone Shuffle]

Not bad

Methinks the iPhone Shuffle needs a voice dialer...

This was funny, though. Damn consumerism. Animation was weak, but content wasn't half bad. Overall okay.

[unfinished flash1]

Here's my take:

1. You need a preloaderhttp://www.newgrounds.com/do wnloads/preloaders/

2. KISS Principle: Keep Introductions Short and Sweet. Otherwise the viewer gets bored.

3. Frame rate. Up it to at least 24 per second.

4. Adding a simple stop function to the last frame keeps it from looping.

5. Don't just slap a song on and call it good. You need to constrain it to the video so it doesn't overlap itself.

Kudos for trying, but you have a long way to go.

darkenedmirror responds:

thanks for the review when my computers fixed im gonna improve it